Serita, a woman who decided to leave the United States

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Serita’s life in Maryland

Serita is from Maryland lived there all her life. She had no motivation to go the College. She did the assessment for militaries. All the high school students can participate in it. She placed very highly but her family was against it. So she decided to study Criminal Justice and be undergraduate. But after college, it was not what she hoped it would be working in this field. She begun to work for a government contract, she delighted it but there was nowhere to go.

After that, she moved to another contracting job with a federal agency and she did training. She liked the fact that she was travelling thanks to the job.  Nevertheless, she has the impression that reinforcement attracts this kind of personalities, backstabbing, cut-throat.  If you’re at the bottom of the total pole everything come down on you, she said. It was anxious and stressed out all the time for her. She moved to hospitality because she had a dream opening an organic restaurant / live music venue, she wanted to work in a restaurant to begin from the bottom and she ends up staying for 5 years. And never opened her restaurant. She got distracted by an easy-going lifestyle. She thought that moving to Berlin was the best decision, she needed a jump start to get out of that, she said.

 

 The reasons that led her to leave the United States

 Trump

She was already in Berlin during the election but it gave her another reason to not come back.She watched the elections. In the beginning, she was super optimistic. Then realised that there was a possibility that a president could be elected. And the results outcome. She felt very bad for her black friends. What does she find alarming is having a president who said during the Charlottesville rally violence, that „You also had some very fine people on both sides“. He does not condemn white supremacy at all.

 

Learning languages

Learning languages is a struggle. She does not speak any other languages. This is also the thing I do not like to be American. For her, the students in the United States are not pushed to learn other languages. They had to take the classes but the competencies are not required. When she came to Berlin, she saw that people can speak several foreign languages. She knows only one and she feels embarrassed. But you do not think about that « when you’re younger, you do not think about how that could help your life as you move on », she said.

Relationships

She thinks that relationships are very superficial, based on your appearance, your network, your financial situation. According to her, you have to fit her certain stereotypes. In Berlin she thinks that you can be whoever you want to be, all these factors do not determine if you are an enough interesting person or not.

A country sexually oppressed

People are raised closed-minded about sexuality. Therefore, people are judged by how many people they slept with.. No matter what you’re wearing. Serita was in in the line of fire a lot of time at her government building job, to wear clothes too tight. Her figures were a distraction. She feels like black women in the United States are seen more as sexual beings, not in a sense like sexually powerful but more to be used for sex. Consequently, some men treat you as if you owe them no matter your intentions. You meet them at a bar, they buy you a drink and presume they paid you for your time.

Black women need more empowerment

For her black women in the United States are not valued, respected. First of all by black men. Black women defended them. they marched for them, they chose but there is something in return. How do they fight for black women? Sometimes she feels that when a black woman goes to a different standard, some black men will belittle, being judgemental instead of appreciating the way they are. It is also concerning their appearance. Many people that wore their natural hair have been told they look unprofessional, looks messy, it does not look nice. This kind of thoughts has still some repercussion in the American black community.

For Serita, her mum always straight her hair. She stopped to straighten her hair as she wanted to die her hair It’s been almost 10 years that she did not use relaxer. Nevertheless, she still feels deeply uncomfortable with her natural hair. She recognized that she needs to work on it. She does not like the way she looks with her natural hair. She prefers herself with braids when her hair is straight she feels better about the way she looks. She grew up with women that straight her hair and it takes a lot of time to get rid of this mentality. You should do to do wear your natural hair without any judgement.Fortunately, times are changing. When you have outside forces, coming at you, threatening you, you start banding together you support each other. People empower each other and leading to self-acceptance.

 

There is no reason for her to go back to the USA. She comes back from time to time to visit her close relations. She feels well living in Berlin and does not see herself to live everywhere else for the moment.The United States is the country where she has been raised and Berlin is the city where she does feel at home. Her blog.

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